Sunday, June 08, 2008

News and all that kind of jazz



As regular readers (if I have any left) are well aware, I have rather fallen out of the habit of writing quite as regularly as I used to. The era of my highest productivity harks back to a time when I was single, and entirely convinced of my complete inability to captivate a woman who wasn't (a) ugly as sin, and (b) younger than forty. As it has always been my considered opinion that what the human race needs most is the opportunity to have a good laugh at another's expense, I regularly regaled my reading public with (sadly true) stories of my ineptitude.

However, a serendipitous concatenation of circumstances has happily proved me wrong. Contrary to most predictions that I would die alone and be subsequently gobbled up by ravenous Alsatians (or Dobermans, if you prefer that), I did end up meeting a popsy who did not see such a morbid fate for me. That was a year ago, and my blogging frequency stands testimony to that. While I might – quite fairly – lay the blame for my unproductivity at her doorstep, I think I have been most suitably recompensed in several other ways.

After spending several months in bliss, during which I blew my savings up travelling around rather a large swathe of the old continent, a brainwave struck me sometime last Christmas. I had previously been made aware of how cheap everything was on Boxing day (which, to the uninitated, falls on the 26th of December).

'Hmm, old chap, what say you about getting hitched and all that?', said the fevered bit of my mind to the rest.

'Get engaged? Are you insane? Do you know how much rings cost!?'

'It's Boxing Day, mate. Discounts!'

'Alright!'

So, the aforementioned popsy and I walked along to Princes street in Edinburgh, which wa s where I knew I would find the discounted ring my fevered mind spoke so highly of. But first, I had to get rid of her.

'Hey, look, Next has a sale!', said I.

'Cool, let's pop by and take a look.', said she, rather unhelpfully.

'No, I'd rather not.'

'Oh okay then, let's just walk around'

'No, I think they're selling lingerie there. And I'd rather avoid the embarassment of looking like a perv checking out women's underwear. You go ahead.'

After I'd got rid of her, I scooted off to the Swarovski outlet to pick a ring up. I hadn't bargained on one thing, though – a smiling helpful salesperson angling for a tip for her role in executing what is probably the most important decision in one's life.

After staving her repeated attempts to be excessively helpful, and trying not to blush as she kept throwing knowing looks at me, I managed to pick a ring that looked just about right.

Now, what a sensible bloke would do would be to book a place at a swanky restaurant for that evening, and take yon popsy there to pop the question. But I'm not a sensible bloke; worse still, I am parsimonious to a fault.

So, I dragged her along to a Starbucks and popped the question.

And incredibly enough, she said Yes!

(I got rather an earful for asking a question as important as this at a place like Starbucks, and did end up having to pay for an expensive restaurant. Also, my ring selection skills left much to be desired – we returned to Swarovski to exchange the ring for another.)

Anyway, there you have it, folks – I'm engaged to be married. :)


-- End of bulletin --


19 comments:

The Insane Genius said...

Long time reader :-)

Congrats! :-)

N said...

wow! brilliant news sidd, congratulations!

p.s: if only i could say my blog's slow death was due to a girl...

Dinesh said...

I wish I could have something similar to write on my blog :-). Sigh, the list of single, desperate South Indian bloggers will suffer a great loss.

Just kidding. Congrats man! You're an inspiration to the rest of us single blokes!

Anonymous said...

You might call me a long-time reader, though...
1) I doubt you remember me :)
2) I rarely comment anything
3) I look totally out of place here, taking into account all the other commenters
But that never stops me from dropping by once in a while
Yaroslava
P.S.Nice move you made there...congratulations (from an absolutely unknown person, but congratulations nevertheless)

Siddhu said...

Thank you, Insane Genius.:) I didn't realise I had any readers left at all! :)

Siddhu said...

Thanks, Neon! I don't think your blog's dead btw. I've been off the blogosphere awhile; but I spent most of yesterday (and quite a bit of time at work today) reading your blog. :D

Mine, on the other hand, is suffering from rigor mortis. It's time to spit on my hands and wake the old place up.

Perhaps I should read a wodehouse or two before I do so, though. I don't like the way I write anymore. :(

Siddhu said...

Thanks, Dinesh!!

I ain't single nomore, Dinesh, but the desperation still burns within! I wouldn't be a good Chennai boy if I weren't desperate and lecherous, now, would I? ;)

Siddhu said...

1. Thanks, Yaroslava.

2. Of course I remember you. You're my only Belarussian reader!!!

3. I think I have another regular reader who's from quite close to where you're from. She doesn't comment, neither, unless she decides to effect a change in policy upon seeing this. ;) So, I guess you ain't out of place (if I understand you right).

Besides, the blog of small things is a public house!

Anonymous said...

I say.. you've proved yourself wrong. Ain't that rummy! Congratulations to you and the unfortunate popsy! ;)

Anonymous said...

thanks a lot, aswin :-)

Siddhu said...

Thanks a lot, Aswin! :D

And Galiya, this is _my_ blog - where I crow!

Hence, for the purposes of this blog, you're known as the 'Extremely fortunate popsy'.

Kroopa Shah (Kr00pz) said...

Congratulations Siddhu!

Anonymous said...

Congrats man... So you proved to be fraud mallu :-p
best of luck,
Sriram.S

Anonymous said...

apoopa...
Congrats man.. :)
I hope u remeber who this is?? :P

Anonymous said...

Same Old Anon: A long time regular reader (of whatever little you seem to post) - I don't think I have ever commented.....but here goes - Congrats and All the best for your new life to together !!!

Navin V said...

Hey Sid.. Congrats man :)

Anonymous said...

congrats & all the best!!


- an Old reader & 2 yrs your junior at CLRI...

Agent M said...

Hey Sid!

CONGRATULATIONS!

Wish you a happy, uh, engaged life :)
(belated, by the way :) )

Dunno if you remember me, but we used to be blogging pals earlier... Mohan (aka Neo Garfield aka Agent M) from Witness Times (I got my own domain now - witnesstimes.com)

I can see that you're having a wonderful time in Edinburgh :)

Hope that you continue blogging :) It always was, and is still, a pleasure to read your blog :) I might also add that you were my inspiration to start blogging ;)

Cheers buddy, and have a happy unsingled life :)
Mohan

Jaishree said...

Hi Sidd.. I just randomly came across your blog.. I knew one Siddhu Warrier in chennai.. (i stayed in norton road) is your mom shobha? My name's Jaishree, btw.

Well, well! Since this dates to two years back, my wishes are to be belated! :D